Friday, 5 June 2009
Me and her
“I saw the glorious moon pampered by its dark blanket cloud of night, while its luminous light bleeds in a reddish-yellow glow. I saw the moon hides as the dawn approaches making way for her well-praised brother of the day. I saw the moon sets on the dark-blue horizon while the sun rises from the purple blue horizon of the east. I saw the sunlight shimmers through the clouds as its climbs up to the sky. I saw the sunlight creeps through the darkest corners of the city as the rats return home from a nightful play.
The once silent city is now slowly waking up to a brand new day as some clings the dream they had the night before, not wanting to face the unforgiving hours of work. However, a soul stands quietly still on the ledge of the building staring down at the deep abyss of the task that had haunted him for all these nights. That soul was me…,” said Nazreen to himself as he scribbles those words down into his yellow notebook. The perfectly blend colours of the grey clouded sky with the colours of the scratched faded light blue paint of the building and the torn blue jeans of his creates a beautiful contrast that could only be appreciated by a photographer.
Nazreen quietly sits there at the edge of the roof staring at the empty streets as a great wave of warm summer’s breeze sweeps through carrying with it the unguarded writings of his. He saw the papers flew past by him and towards the open air. Deep inside him he wished he was apart of the pieces of papers. Flying in the open sky away from the busy city life, and where ever they land they will be forgotten.
His fingers wrapped around any solid surface as he grips the edge of the rooftops gaining his confidence. The sweats running through his fingers make it even harder to hold on. He looks down once again at the abyss beneath his feet, thinking: “I’ve got to do this. It is now or never. It would be a lot harder if you let the sunrises. C’mon now, Nazz. Don’t be a pussy, jump and get through with it.”
When he finally gains the extra courage, he stands at the ledge with his right foot in front of him. His hands still holds on to the ladders of the water house. As he stands, there his whole life flashes before his eyes. A short life it is, a short miserable life but still a life. His hearts pounced life a loosed train within his rib cage, his voice echoed from his scream indicating that he would finally do what he had dying to do. That is dying.
“Are you gonna jumped or just scream?” a voice interrupts his main event. “I really wish you don’t. It would totally ruin my day.” The voice came out from a sweet strawberry pink lip behind a beautiful chocolate river hair that flows elegantly in front of her perfectly carved face, hiding those ocean blue diamond eyes as the figure walked out of the shadow and up to nervous suicidal kid. “But if u have to. Then hurry up with it or else get off the edge.” She looked into his eyes. “So what’s it gonna be big shot? Dead or Alive. You choose.”
“Excuse me, but who are you?” asked the confused Nazreen.
“No one special, just came up here to see the view,” answered the girl.
“Oh… ok .If you don’t mind I’m into something here.”
“I know you’re gonna jump. Just want you to hurry up. You’re spoiling the view.”
“I…..I…” the puzzled Nazreen tries to forget the girl and concentrate on his jump. “Aren’t you going to stop me or try to persuade me not to jump?”
“Nah, not really. You must have your reasons to be here and beside not as if you would change your mind even if I did tried. Will you?” said the girl while sipping her coffee.
“No but I might have.”
“Then you’re not really suicidal but an attention seeker.”
“Aren’t they all?”
“Yeah... so you do not really want to die just want little bit more of the limelight. Why don’t you go and join a talent show or something instead, uh?” she suggested.
“But I do want to die..!”
“then go ahead..” she said.
Nazreen looked forward trying his best not to take notice at the girl next to him. By this time the sun was already up and about. After a while, he got back into his state of mind and ready once again to jump. As he let his left foot forward there was a humming tune next to him. He stares at her. She mouthed sorry before letting him return to his suicide. Once again, he had his left foot out , ready to jump. And once again she interrupted him with the question, “So why exactly do you want to die?”
“Look its none of your business alrite..!” he answered with a tone of annoyance.
“I’m just curious because you looked really determined to jump. Meaning your problem must be really bad.” She said. “The only person I know who this determined to die was my friend’s uncle, Thomas if I’m not mistaken, that’s also because he blamed himself for the accident of his wife. Now you didn’t killed anyone did ya?”
“Look I have my reasons alrite!” he said.
“I know, that’s why I’m so bloody curious.”
“Miss I’m trying to kill myself here if you don’t mind. I need peace and quiet.”
The surroundings was fading away as the motion-filled city calms into a quiet setting for his suicide. Clearing his minds and relaxing his feet and with all his senses alert as possible, he shifted his weight forward and dived in with open arms, shouting “freedom….” Or at least that how it happened in his mind. But sadly the girl didn’t stop asking. “Was it a lost lover? Broken hearts are the main caused of suicide but I’m sure we can fix that.” Nazreen walked down from the ledge in anger. Grabbing books and pencils and stuffed them into his bag. Ignoring any comments she had to say about him.
“Or is it, family matters? If it is family matters then you’ve got to toughen up little sisie, everyone have family problems?” she said as he walked toward the door.
“Where are you going? Not going to jump? So you are just an attention seeker are you?” She saw him shutting the door behind him. She gave a little laugh as she turn towards the view. She felt happy and proud of her actions.
Once the cup was empty she started to walk back towards the door when her eye caught the sight of a yellow notebook lying in the dirt between the legs of the water house. She picked the book up examining it before placing in her front pockets of her blue sleeping robes. She walked away with the dirt and black stains on the sole her white fluffy bunny rabbit sleeping slippers.